Decisions, decisions, what to do???

Have you ever been at a crossroad in your life and just didn't know what direction to take? I seem to be there right now and I'm feeling fairly lost. Part of it has to do with my job or lack of... the other part is not as specific, more like just my life in general, and I'm not sure what to do. I've had a cloud hanging over me for quite sometime now and I just can't seem to get rid of it.

I am "working" as in a casual position at the local hospital in their scheduling office, but they haven't been calling me for the longest time. I've called them a few times and each time the same thing - nope no shifts right now call again - when I know people were picking up shifts. Its really getting to be a pia! The casual part is great for my schedule - as I am also doing part time work with my dad (that is slow right now too) going back to school, and I also volunteer at our Cultural Center and that can take up a lot of time, though I'm trying to cut back on that one. I also applied for a temp full time position in the same office at the hospital that came up and so far no word on that one either. I finally decided I've had enough waiting around and said to myself that if there is no word from them this morning - screw 'em - I'll look for something else.

Wouldn't you know it, after all this time (since last september) they finally called today?? I wasn't home so they left a message... So what do I do? Do I go and pick up shifts (obviously go for a quick retraining as its been a while) or do I tell them no thanks I've got something else and start/continue looking elsewhere? They are really nice (or they used to be) in that office and I did enjoy it there, but their lack of professionalism the last little while has really upset me...

Another thing to add to the mix is do I really want to do that job?? Do I actually enjoy it enough to continue or is "just a paycheque"? We're doing okay, its not like I have to work, but the extra $ is always good. So do I go back and just be there for a pay cheque or do I not and try and figure out something that I would actually enjoy doing, where getting paid is a bonus???

Anyways, I've had this cloud hanging over me for the last little while, and though sometime it does disappear for a little while, it seems to come back, and right now darker than ever... I've only gone into the job part of my cloud, but I have other reasons as well but I don't feel like sharing those just yet...so I apologize to all my friends and family, especially my loving DH for being such a down and out blob, and thank you to them as well for just being there for me...